Summer Camp

2 Years Ago…Today

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It’s hard to believe that two years have passed since Amy’s memorial service. Today has been a difficult day – surprisingly – for me. Two things have kept me going today. The first is the song God woke me up singing: “Even If” by MercyMe. The second was the memory of my boys honoring their mother at the service. To honor Amy and my three boys, below are the parting words of each of my three boys to, and about, their mother. Isaiah went first, Micah followed directly after him, and Gabe spoke right before the final worship song. I hope these words move you as much as they’ve moved me today.

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ISAIAH

14324483_10210808805555894_1872310915559200635_oThe first thing that I think you should know about my mom is that she changed me through her ministry to other people. Mom taught me many things and gave me many qualities of herself to continue on in her memory. She taught me to be creative and to try new things; she taught me how to cook; she taught me how to be nice to and serve others; and she gave me a passion to work with kids.

Besides the many creative things I’ve attempted and enjoyed with my mom’s encouragement, she taught me how to cook like she cooked. I am glad I know how to cook her chicken, make her version of slop, and bake her amazing chocolate chip cookies.

When I was 5, Mom let me really help her bake chocolate chip cookies for the first time. We had fun, even though there was a big mess to clean up. The best part about that day was that it was the first time I got to do “quality control”, something my dad usually got to do.

Over the years, I have watched my mom volunteer at many Beaverton Foursquare camps. This past 4-5 Camp I got to volunteer with her for both my first and her last time. Every year, even when she was tired, she didn’t stop working at camp because she wanted to serve the kids and staff, thinking of their needs, not her own. I want to go back to 4-5 Camp as a volunteer though and help honor her legacy of love and care of others.

The second thing I want you to know about my mom was that she loved everyone she met. I want to live up to her example. You may not know that there were many people who loved and trusted my mom with many different things. She loved everyone, and hardly ever said “No” to serving others, even us kids.

I loved crawling into her lap – even just a few weeks ago – and she would hold me until I fell asleep in her arms. I may have surpassed her in height this summer, but I will have to strive to come close to her supernatural height and her model of faith.

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MICAH

14310560_10210808805995905_5256768924942963016_oMy freshman year I went to my school’s graduation ceremony, and every single graduate had the opportunity to give mini-speeches and thank the people they love. Mom leaned over to me and said, “20 bucks says that you couldn’t fit song titles into your speech.” So, instead of a graduation speech, I decided that for the circumstances, maybe we could make it this speech instead? Besides, she owes me 20 bucks already. But I guess I should just “Let It Go.”

From the time that she watched me do the “Single Ladies” dance that I have regretted since, to her pummeling me with a stuffed shark because I couldn’t understand the lyrics to “Hit Me with your Best Shot”, to her trying (and succeeding) to make me crumple to the floor by tickling my earlobe, mom was always mom.

Over the last two weeks of her life, Mom persistently pestered me about college applications, particularly, an essay for one specific college. They wanted a paper on my Jesus story, and how I have grown in Him. And although I know there was “Something to Believe In,” I struggled to find a way to write about my faith story. “How can I help you?” she kept asking me. I didn’t know what help I needed, so I didn’t answer my mother’s question. I spent so much time upstairs in my room or with my friends to avoid her bugging me. Today, I wish I hadn’t. For those of you wondering, I have not finished that essay, but I know who it will be about. Don’t worry, mama. I’ll make you “Proud of Your Boy.”

Two weeks ago, to this day, I was at work for an 8-hour, on my feet, being nice to people, shift. I was having a no-good, very bad day, and I called home. My supervisor was going to let me go on a meal break soon, and I felt like I just needed to come home. So I came home and had dinner with the family. It was a bit chaotic: I felt like a rushed mess, and they all had finished their food already. Mom made them wait at the dinner table for an extra 45 minutes just for me, but it felt normal. I didn’t even remember that mom was sick. “I Want the Good Times Back. That Would Be Enough.” We were laughing and playing games until I had to race back to work.

“How can I help you?”

Mom always asked that. To everyone.

I asked, “Are you okay?”

The day before her passing, we were having a great time. We went bowling to celebrate a final day of summer as a family of five. Little did we know, that was our last celebration as a family of five. About halfway through the game, Mom started feeling sick. We thought it was just another bad night.  She has had so many over the last 2 years. When we got home, Dad and I helped her upstairs. I wish I remember the last thing she said to me. But I remember what I told her: “Are you gonna be okay, Mom?”

So many people had no idea how sick my mom was.

You see, she didn’t want all the attention on her. She didn’t want everyone to treat her differently. So, instead of complaining, she changed the topic. She chose to focus on her gifts, rather than her sickness. My mom served in ministry for 30 years. Knowing her state of health, it “Blows Us All Away” how continually and unfailingly hospitable she was.

IMG_90661I’m wearing those bowling shoes now. We called the venue, and they let me borrow them to honor the last time Mom was Mom, focusing on celebrating with us. I kinda wish I could just click my heels and we would be together again. She taught me to laugh, she taught me to love. So much of me is made of what I learned from mom. And it will stick with me “For Good.”

As Christians, we don’t have to be eternally sad because we know that we will someday meet again in the Presence of the Lord. So, I get to say “Goodbye Until Tomorrow.”

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GABRIEL

14409486_10210808859717248_1674417536705584557_oHi, everybody. I’m Gabriel, and good afternoon. Amy was my mom and I just miss her so much. I wish she was here with me right now. I just want her with me. What made me really happy was how she just loved me. And I just wanted, for all of us, if we could just love on her and wrap around her heart.

I’m going to miss her because she was there. But I’m excited that she’s stuck in Heaven right now. She always sung me, “How great is our God.” That was the first lullaby she ever sang to me. It took me forever to learn her. It took me years to figure out why she was my mother. And then I got it. She loved Jesus very much. I hope you do too.

Our last song is “10,000 Reasons.” Some of you know it by heart. It was one of my mom’s favorite worship songs when we were a family together. In this whole memorial service, we have been just loving her. Thank you all for coming. Let’s sing together her last song.

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Amy gave my boys a passion to be servant warriors in her footsteps, to be a spark of joy in someone’s day, and to be someone who loves for no other reason than because God put the person into their lives. I married this incredible, amazing woman 21 years ago, and even though she is stuck in Heaven, as Gabriel put it, she is also stuck in our hearts.

It’s just coffee!

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For 5 years, Amy took care of everyone at camp, from the camper’s dietary needs, to the staff’s late night hankering for cereal, and our fearless director’s love for Diet Coke and peanut M&M’s. She knew how to make everyone feel welcome, valued, and loved. It was her gift, and not everyone knew how much of herself she poured into that work or how much time and energy it required of her.

Amy became revered for the iced coffee treat she put out halfway through camp. It doesn’t taste like coffee. It tastes like liquid dessert. Last year, our hospitality team put it out in her honor. I took one drink and bawled, for an hour!

Today, I slowly drank a cup, holding back tears, not knowing why I was trying to and trying not to cry at the same time. Fifteen minutes later we sang “Your Love Never Fails” in worship. I couldn’t stop the tears. And then our speaker flattened me.

Speaking on Joshua 4, Tim Love said, “Our lives can be memorials for others who come after us.” Then he encouraged us to make memorials when God is faithful and sovereign so 1) we don’t forget, and 2) others can be encouraged and inspired from those memorials.

I find it uniquely odd and yet comforting that Abba God would make a memorial out of a used plastic cup and a signature red straw. Sometimes I close my eyes and feel Amy right next to me. Then my heart rends itself in two upon the reminder from my soon open eyes: she is not right next to me, not physically at least.

In time, Amy’s liquid love dessert may no longer be served at camp, but for me, this monument will always remind me that Amy’s legacy will live on to touch many more than she ever knew. God is faithful.

When was the last time God proved to you He is Faithful and Sovereign? How can you memorialize that incredible event?

The Devil be Damned

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Two nights ago, I waxed poetic about the “increasingly irritating insomniac incubus” within the smoke detectors in my house. I knew we were dealing with Spiritual Warfare, but thought, “Good grief, why give the devil the spotlight?” I focussed more on God’s intervention and flexed my alliterative skills, trying to show the humor.

Every year, leading in to camp season, spiritual warfare is center stage. Most years I’m prepared, or at least quick to recognize and change tactics. This year, it “started late” – or rather l noticed it late. The incubus within the smoke detectors got my FULL attention. Shortly after posting last, the sucubi entered the fray: two major issues exploded within my home – the kind that hit you so hard out of nowhere, it takes a beat to recover. Yesterday was challenging just getting to camp. It was almost 7p.m. when I finally arrived! I’m usually here at 3p.m. in full setup mode. The setup surprisingly was still finished with time to spare.

Today was the day for half our coaches and deans to go back to the church, collect our campers and return for a packed evening. Everything was going without a hitch until the buses didn’t show. After much prayer and a scramble of phone calls, four buses appeared (albeit two hours late), but we only needed three. Our incredible coaches and activity directors had kept our charges engaged. We finally loaded the buses and hit the road to much applause.

Six miles from camp, one of the now three buses broke down. Having emptied the bus onto the other two, we got back on the road heading for camp. The kids were nearly three hours late, but God…

I have to say, that phrase is quickly becoming my favorite: but God!

… but God had a plan, and things shot into motion. All lost luggage was found, all missing toothbrushes were replaced, and all staff was pumped to see what God’s going to do! I haven’t seen the devil work this hard trying to destroy camp, but I’m not amazed that God is always prepared. The incubi and succubi are shaken at the power of God. They’re terrified about God’s plan for these 4th and 5th graders. I’m excited! God is here, at work mightily, and changing hearts already. The devil be damned!

Smoke Detector Demons

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Smoke Detector

It was just after Midnight this morning when everything went awry. There was a chirping, every 30 seconds. Micah and Isaiah had just come home from watching Jurassic World in 3D. Micah was laughing and telling me how he tortured his brother during the “almost scary” parts of the movie. Isaiah is apparently more fun to watch in an intense movie like this than me. I wasn’t sure how to take that information, but I chuckled and began heading for bed. We all groaned when we heard the chirping. We all knew what it meant.

For some reason, our family is plagued by the Smoke Detector Demons. It is always in the middle of the night when those stupid things go awry. I tasked Micah with changing the battery and set off to bed. Unfortunately, the monster machine with an attitude was the one doubling as a carbon monoxide detector! Thirty seconds after the battery was changed, the demonic detonator of discord began its din again. We pushed buttons. Eh! Eh! We reset the battery. Eh! EH! EH!  We even unplugged it from the ceiling wiring. That apparently was the last straw! We’d muted the maniacal mayhem happening every 30 seconds by inadvertently awaking all five siblings of the beast. Armageddon was fastly approaching. I’m sure the neighbors could hear it by now. Needless to say, my sleeping angel was no longer sleeping. Autism does not like unexpected noises, especially loud ones in the middle of the night.

“Turn that off, Dad!” he yelled.

By sheer luck — more probably the hand of God — Micah and I were able to silence the siren. It was nearing 12:30 a.m.

Eh! Eh! EH! We hung our heads in defeat. Another 5 minutes we discovered the problem: — as noted in size 6 font on the wall side of the dastardly device — the faulty Carbon Monoxide detector had to be “replaced immediately!” I cringed as I called the after-hours-emergency-tenant line for the rental company. After 10 minutes, it was clear that the end of the world was nigh! They could not fix the machine until Home Depot opened. We would have to endure the increasingly irritating insomniac incubus within the machine, every 30 seconds…until HOME DEPOT OPENED!

It was nearly 2:30 a.m. before my numb brain was able to override the tintinnabulum and slip into a fitful, nearly awake, state of sleep. I woke for work at 6:10 a.m. Not ready to be manning a kettle corn trailer at the Hillsboro Saturday Market, but alas I trudged on anyway.

Work was painfully slow; my brain was wading through the sludge of over-due sleep requirements. I went to play practice after work and found out my son needed sandals for the camp dramas in only 2 days. My bed seemed to be slipping farther and farther away from me. When I opened the door to my house shortly after 5 p.m., the irritant was still sounding off every 30 seconds. Because of weekend issues, the handyman could not get a key from the office to simply come into my home while I was away and fix the problem. I passed out from sheer exhaustion at 5:40 p.m. Micah arrived home shortly after and was able to direct the handyman when he finally arrived around 6:00 p.m. I woke to a pounding, dehydration headache at 8:00 p.m. The silence was blissful! I ate two microwavable, frozen burritos while updating you, my readers. I’m heading back to bed in minutes. Hopefully, the near gallon of water I’ve been chugging, along with the Tylenol, will alleviate my still throbbing head while I “uneventfully” slip back into the coma of sleep.

Thank God I have an incredible son who took charge of the situation when he was off work tonight! He even took his brothers to Red Robin for dinner! I haven’t heard such blessed silence in years! Hopefully the sleep will be blessed!